Hey guys!

I just realised that my blog views reaches 1800+ !! Thank you for expressing interest in my life! I was so shocked when I saw that amount of views! I mean.. My life isn't that interesting anyway.,. Okay you can say it is.. somewhat..?

The past week have been pretty busy for me as I've been going out almost everyday.. Yep im not kidding. Well okay I stayed home yesterday because mother didnt let me go out (i was so stressed idk why omg Im so sorry wifey) But yea I think its probably because the person Im going out with is SUPER CHIO and pretty and beautiful girl so yea I guess I was quite insecure that I didnt put on makeup as she did? So yea lah arguement with mother and yada bleh

Well its been tiring going out everyday, but I really enjoy these days! I get to spend time with everyone that I havent seen in ages! Speaking of which, i had breakfast with my primary school friends, Clems, Mels, and Ben (well technically he was there) So yeaaaa. we teased Ben alot because his accent changed due to the two years he spent in Canada and we were talking about Maple leaves AHAHAH. Maple leaves are cool! Maybe if i can find one I'll laminate it and use it as a bookmark hahahah, provided the leave is pretty :)

I also did a tour video of ESPS for Ben! Many things have changed, after all theres the new principal and all, theres bound to be changes. I still prefer Mr Teo though, although he is naggy heheheh. Apparently ESPS field is gone now. They're building some structure there and im not exactly sure if its an extension to the building or just an ISH :o I guess we just have to wait and see! The construction workers were like giving us wierd looks when we were walking around.. probably because they weren't expecting any visitors i guess? Idk, or maybe its just my wierdness HEHEH.

One other annoying thing about these days is that I keep getting paired up with this guy although I am absolutely single. But he's my bro though. Hence I'm close to him. (Im mostly close with guys k) Anyway because of me being close to my bro my friend is pretty jealous now.. Well if im in her shoes I'd go around with a knife already-- nvm the point is I hurt this pretty lady and I didnt even realise. What kind of a friend am I? Gosh I really dont know.. I'm so occupied with reconnecting, having fun with everyone that I neglected her ( idk lah but I can feel that the connection is getting weaker and weaker). But maybe its just me? But I guess its my fault bah.. But seriously i have no idea what to do really. I'll ask mom in the morning.

Can't believe im actually reflecting and updating my blog now at like 2am in the morning hais. I should be sleeping now but yea im still up. I seriously shouldn't be up but I really cant sleep hahahha. Well at least this blog post helps me sort out my thinking.

Sometimes I feel that my blunt attitude is really bad. I mean like I can literally go up to you (regardless of if youre a stranger) and just go like " Youre pretty" "I like your hair" "I think youre wierd but thats a compliment" Yea so maybe I should rein that in. I dont think being blunt in the society now will do me good. In fact, i think it'll bring me more harm I think. I wish i dont have such an eccentric behavior too. I mean, Im really wierd. But i think its a good thing because I stand out from the crowd i guess?

Also I wish I can sing. Well i can, but i sing terribly. I really dislike my voice and i have no idea why.. Maybe I should just go for voice training and hopefully my voice would sound nicer. I hope hahaha.

I really cant wait to go to Indonesia! However, mother said that i cant go mt Merapi - which is the destination i was looking forward to the most. What a disappointment.. I would definitely love to see obsidian stones and maybe the diamonds the harvest ( I quote Lorde " I've never seen a diamond in the flesh" - Royals) hehehe Lorde is awesome!

Speaking of Lorde, I love her song "Tennis Court"! Initially I couldn't understand what was going on in the MV but suddenly it dawned upon me that she was singing with her eyes! What a brilliant gem. I'm looking forward to listening to more of her songs! Although she's barely a year older than me, she acheived way more than me and due to that, sometimes I feel inferior but  I guess I can dream right? Maybe complete my course and get my dream job and all.

Is it just me or this post is extremely long HAHAHAHA. Good luck to those who actually bothered to read man. You must really care alot to read till the end. Anyway, I costested with Kerry recently and wow I became really lazy. I took quite awhile to finish my makeup and all, but at least its even and droopy (Because the character is sad) So yea even if i smile it looks like a sad smile. Much nice.

I'm not exactly sure if I want to end here or not.. Gosh I have too many things running through my mind. Maybe I should just write something right?

You fought to live, you fought to protect

In the process earning great respect , 

you lost your sanity

because there's a price to pay for everything. 

Relaxing your grip on the fragile string that ties you to humanity

You fall hard, expecting the worst, but it never came

Why? You wondered. You try to stand up. But you realised you're shackled.

"Let me go!" You screamed to no avail. No one can hear you. The silent darkness cloaks you with cold.

You shiver.

Okay so I have no idea what exactly I've written. It just flowed into my mind naturally. But it seems to be full of despair ahahaha.. Well, I tried. My playlist is like playing The Wanted songs right now. Bringing me back down feelings lane. Whatever I felt when I listened to their songs all came rushing back to me, and it really brings back memories! Ah. Nostalgia.

I guess I should really sleep now. The best song to describe my feelings now is probably Reason - Hoobastank. Yea i know, its an old song, but still dear to me. 

Nights! 

Meri